There is what in part is missing from my sitch. H will admit to some wrong doing or accept that his behaviour was distructive but does not admit to being/having been selfish or wrong. In fact it almost seems as if (by some of his phrases) his poor behaviour is excusable because after all he was still paying the bills and taking the trash to the dump.
How does paying the bills make up for having affairs, being emoitionally and physically absent, lying, neglect etc.
Somehow in my h's mind being a good financial provider = being a good husband and the other things are insignificant no need to be a friend, companion, partner, lover, co-parent just pay the bills, cut the lawn and take the trash to the dump and you're covered no matter what you do wrong?
When I explain to h how I feel and that it's difficult for me to accept that his changes are real, genuine and lasting based on past experience with him the things that he has done that have hurt our r are thrown asside and replaced with "I've given you a pretty good life haven't I"
Because I've had a roof over my head and food in the fridge I shouldn't be hurt or feel a loss for not having had the basic elements of a r?
