Started my day out with a 4 mile run. Robx must be right about my testosterone levels, because my runs aren't close to what they use to be.
Got to work rather early so I could be at home in time to pick up girls. I did find a replacement for the pendant I lost on Saturday and put in an order. W stopped by daycare to drop of carseat. Girls saw her car and wanted to go see her. We stop by.
M: "What did you do to your hair?" W: "I ruined it." M: "It looks fine." W: "I'm going to change it back."
She has dyed her hair to a much lighter brown. It doesn't look bad. In fact I think it was close to that color when I met her, it is just quite a bit different. That was about the extent of our conversation today.
When W left, D3 had a meltdown. She wanted to go with mommy. She got over it after a while. The girls and I watched Witch Mountain this evening and then went to bed. Not too bad for their first night alone with me.
Rob, right?! It can't be.
LOL!
Tristan, from now on call me "Rob", no need to add the x anymore, my name isn't Malcolm ;-)
As for me being right, it happens, I'm not 100% all the time but I pride myself on the education I've afforded myself in the past 2 years on this whole topics of WAW's, affairs, the changes in men & women in their 30s, why affairs happen, the things to do to turn things around, the things not to do, being masculine, being a man, not being an a$$hole or a prick, body language, lies, deception, etc.
I would really love it if you would take some of our advice and try it - you have nothing to lose at this point. By your own admission, you would be a "poor date", great, all the better reason to do it, time to pump up your confidence and get it going in the right direction.
I'm not asking you to sleep with another woman. I'm not asking you to get romantically involved. I'm asking you to turn your situation around, I'm asking you not to spend 1-2 years learning this and to learn from our experiences: a smart man learns from his experiences, a smarter man learns from the experiences of others so that he doesn't have to repeat the same mistakes to achieve the same results.
Im asking you to date other women.
I'm asking you to review Steve McQueen's post several times because I couldn't have put it in better words myself (puppy, I think that post deserves your 4 whistles award).
Think about it, review it, examine it, think about it.
People who have affairs will lie to their spouses, admitting the gory details of the affair and how far it's actually progressed is something most WAW's would never admit to unless they are forced to.
She's on many meds, I hear you, I've been through that with my own wife, your thread is the one that interests me the most out of all of these because it mirrored my own situation more closely than any of the others.
I can't force you to do anything. In fact I don't want to either. I am only excited to be able to offer you the insight and advantage of my own experience because our situations are so similar so you don't have to drag your sorry behind for several months until you get it in your head to actually try this.
Stop supplicating your wife and enabling her behaviors because she has "mental health issues".
You want to lift your wife out of the fog she's in, give her a dose of the medicine she's been feeding you but remain in control during the entire time. View her responses, watch as your own behaviors and confidence improve, watch as your self-respect & self-value grow by leaps & bounds because you start to realize how valuable a person you really are - you currently let your wife determine your value which is why you are stuck in limbo, trying to decide what you should do with yourself while your wife enjoys the "company" of another man.
Whatever you do, realize that action is required in some form or another, good intentions will get you no where.
