Hope you are well, you seem to be weighing up pro and cons. Re read your threads and the responses. It's clear that you're almost ready to let him go. You will of course have days when you are doubtful (we all will) but they will get less and less. The yobby behaviour is off putting for you.
If you let him go (let him go in your head and heart) and he wants to come back you can consider it then.
Stop trying by truly living your own life maybe? Not hoping for him to react to what you do?
With is emails you can either choose to 1. reply and try and maintain contact, open yourself up to possibly more pain 2. ignore not know of his reaction or 3. email back asking him to stop, darker than dark.
