LOL RR...I actually tried to get a curandara (a hispanic faith healer) to do a love spell. It can't hurt...but don't do what I did and spend a whole lot of money.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Hmm. I wondered if the love spells worked. LOL. Guess I'll stick to an occasional peek at the horoscope instead! Potentially tough emotionally but not so harmful to the wallet. So tell me more, I'm curious. You tried to do the spell, or you did it? The helpless feeling of being powerless causes us to consider some weird stuff. I gave the guy $15 for the stone. Not too much, but probably more than I should have. Trying to keep faith that everything is just as it should be for reasons we don't yet understand. That works ok logically. But the heart is slow to follow.
Just saw apt.#75. 76 in an hour. (or is it 76 & 77? I've lost countI can't believe this. Well after today I'm going to focus on buying instead, so maybe it's just as well. However, if the court orders I pay the slumlord money, I will no longer have the downpayment. Maybe I should go into court saying I dont' have any money?. Can't pluck a chicken with no feathers.
I did try the spell. I was THAT desparate. No, it didn't work. As a matter of fact, I think it did the opposite lmao...
Of course, the curandara said it was because I did it wrong. Whatever, I don't think I really believed it in the first place, so I paid her and just left it at that.
I did go see a psychic a few times. It was interesting, and some of it was very accurate. I will probably do that again. But really, I figure it goes by what your faith is. If your faith says that love spells work, then they might.
But I also believe that you need to be careful what you wish for, or you just might get it, and then some you don't want. So now, I just figure whatever is going to happen is going to happen, and as far as stbx is concerned, I hope he finds happiness. I have
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I went early to court to ask for an adjournment. They couldn't grant it without the LL being present. I was so afraid to see her, but I contacted her and she came to meet me. We made an agreement. Not perfect, but it's a compromise after all. I get a 2 month rent abatement for living in the conditions I have, she keeps my 3 month deposit. Beginning Oct 1, I will pay full amt of monthly rent. I agreed to be out asap, but no later than Jan 2010. I drop the complaints, she drops the legal proceeding. I signed and left. Then got a text from her that she wants to make peace now. I can remain a tenant if I would be willing to remove all her garbage from the basement at my expense so that she can do mold remediation. Now why didn't she just do that in the beginning and save us all this stress and trouble. I lost my entire summer to this headache, for nothing. Shysta. I'm going to have champagne for lunch. Miracle. As soon as that pressure lifted, I feel much less desperate and lonely for Mark. It was just the stress making me feel I needed him. In fact I'm ticked off at him cuz he was supposed to get me receipts for all the work we did here before my court date and he called lastnight to say he can't do it in time to be useful to my case. Remember how I jumped to help him when he needed his files a month ago?I'm angry and disappointed with him that he let me down. Turns out I won't need them now.... but he doesn't know that. Yesterday my car battery died in some remote area and I had to abandon my car. I've just joined AAA and I hope this isn't considered a pre-existing condition. LOL. Off to get the car and resume a normal life. Calling off the apt. search for now. Maybe take the kid & the dogs to the beach when school gets out. We missed out on summer fun due to the housing troubles - I think it's time to make up for it!
Oh I know that feeling. I mean, you need something, they procrastinate, ignore...etc...but God forbid THEY need something. Then they are up your A$$!!!!!!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Yesterday my D said, Mom it's pathetic how much time you spend on that divorce site . I think you should get a life and stop reading that stuff. Get over it and let's move on already. Hmmmm. Well she's only 12, she doesn't know about the experiences we've had. But I have to say, there is some wisdom there too. It gets back to the helplessness of having no control. I feel like if I can stay focused and read other people's experiences that somehow it will help me and my sitch. I still want Mark in my life. I miss him. I saw him 2 a.m.s in a row driving by the park where I take the dogs. I suppose he's headed to pick up his son for school. He didn't see me. Weird to know he's right there 20 ft from me, and yet so far.
I am a new person without the worries of my apartment situation. I'm going to begin my gal plans today.
Save me from myself. I met some friends, we drank, we danced, we had fun. But I carry BF next to me. I wrote him a text and I'm almost drunk enough to send it. Says - "whatever I do, wherever I am I miss you. I intend no pressure. I know you don't want "us", and I will not bother that. In fact I admit this has been good. Just want you to know that I care about you and I miss my companion. Hope you are happy and well. Tell me.... was it real?" phone here, finger ready to send. It's friday night, his pool night. He doesn't have his son this wknd, he's probably just getting home too. Fair to guess he had a couple drinks also. I should engage the 24 hour rule, right?
Well, you know sending it wasn't going to help anything!
He probably couldn't answer your question anyway. This probably sounds stupid... but it was as real as it was. What he might or might not say now doesn't change that.
I know Jeff. I was a bit melodramatic with a few drinks in me. I had fun out dancing, but everything I do seems a little hollow without him to share it with. This is just sooo frustrating. Sigh. Anyway, I've begun my transformation. I have a list of goals and the process is now underway. If he ever looks back and sees me, he's in for a surprise. :-D Things are good. I'm in much better shape with the apartment pressure off. Now I just need to stick away mad money so I can buy something. I took part in the yoga asanas for peace today with my daughter & former foster son. That was beautiful. Maybe I'm going to call what's his face soon and see what's the delay with my receipts. No contact is killing me.
