I think you are still too nice to her. When she is giving you all that cr@p about her suffering in her A, why don't you tell her what you are thinking instead of holding it in? She needs to hear the truth about herself!
Sandi,
I've already told her several times in the past what I think about her and her behavior. She either doesn't get, is in denial and/or doesn't care. Repeating myself isn't going to get me anywhere; actions will. I don't know how long it is going to take for it to sink into her head that I mean business. When I said I was done with her crap, I meant it. Unfortunately, I think one of the drawbacks of being "understanding" these past six months has been the development of a false sense of confidence in my W. That is going to change.
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As far as the OM goes, he gets off the hook in all of this b/c she's done just exactly what he wanted. But, she is so deep in her fog until "any" other man will do for her and her email said that!
If there is one thing OM is good at, it's being manipulative and skilled in avoiding any accountability. As far as my W's comments go, some of this may have been for both her benefit as well as OM's benefit so he can feel like he is exiting the A as "Mr. Big Shot". Regardless, if my W really thinks she can do better than me, then go for it! I'm an all around great catch- that's not just a positive affirmation, it is the truth!
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I know you still have feelings for her, but I hope you will not give in to her and let her get her way about things. She needs to hear the facts about what kind of "mother" she is. She isn't living in the right century to think that kids automatically go with the mother. Oh, she gets me stired up! You are a nicer person than me, BJ.
No, I'm looking out for my interests and my kids interests now.
M: 41 W: 39 S: 11 S: 10 D: 4 1st contact w/OM: 1/19/09 EA began: 2/14/09 EA discovered: 3/1/09 I file for D 8/25/09 to protect myself _______________________________
