that sounds great you dont need any R talk or answers. if you can really roll with what ever happens (IE he decides to pull back a bit) thats great. sounds like everything is going well
Its been good. Last night when I was ready for bed, I offered him a pillow and blanket if he wanted to sleep on the couch and he said that he would like to come to bed. I noticed that he isnt sleeping waaaay over on the other side of the bed like he was last year, he was actually letting himself touch me, and this morning he was threw a leg over mine. Its a big change from the last time that we shared a bed, and I like it!
I am starting to think its going to be tough for him to leave!
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
So I have a dilemma... Tonight is a good friends 40th birthday, its going to be a lot of fun. H doesnt want to go, he doesnt know her, and I understand that he might not be ready to be meeting my friends. I wonder if I should go, or be spending time with him, I work full time and I am a full time student, so I dont want to be neglecting him when I only have a limited amount of time anyway, Should I not go to the party, or is it GALing?
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
yeah i can see where this would be something to think about.. I think it would be a good idea just to go and have fun at the party. i understand how hard it would be to go but i think like you said GAL is more important right now
I wonder if I should go, or be spending time with him, I work full time and I am a full time student, so I dont want to be neglecting him when I only have a limited amount of time anyway, Should I not go to the party, or is it GALing?
Well, I don't think you're neglecting him if he's invited and declined to go, although I can understand why he doesn't want to. Can you go just for an hour or two and then spend the rest of the time with him tonight? Or half the night at the party and then the 2nd half with him? Something like that.
Thanks Karen, thats about what I ended up doing. I didnt expect there to be so many triggers while hes here. My suspicion has been aroused several times, but he is behaving very diffrently from when he was still living here and involved with OW, and we are still having a good time, ML again, and hes cozying up in bed still, but I still dont know what it all means.
Still no R talk, I guess that I should let him initiate it? Or not, I dont really want to be in limbo anymore.
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
Still no R talk, I guess that I should let him initiate it? Or not, I dont really want to be in limbo anymore.
I know the standard rule is they have to initiate it. But at some point, I do think if you don't want to live in limbo anymore, you're entitled to do the R talk. If you're not at the breaking point though, maybe just let him initiate it. If things go well, and it sounds like they are; you would think he would want to bring that up!!! BR, I think you are one of the strongest DB'ers around here. I'm happy for you, and I've always known you are going to do great!!!
if you can really roll with what ever happens (IE he decides to pull back a bit) thats great. sounds like everything is going well