Thank you all for your responses. I do feel better today. I have to admit, I would rather believe he took it down out of guilt rather than a direct reflection of me.
Interestingly, right after I posted last night he knocked on the door and brought me a drink (when was the last time THAT happened?) and asked me again what was wrong. I just said in the whole scheme of things it wasn't important. He thought it must be important if I was so upset about it. Anyway, he didn't get the full answer. He did give me a nice hug.
I have a hard time sometimes focusing on the baby steps. Him being aware of things being wrong with me is fairly recent, and he pretty much always asks if I seem "off" (must be doing a good job of being happy most of the time!) and seems to really want to know like "my" H would, rather than pre and post bomb when he would ask (meanly) so he could have more fuel for his fire, something else I was doing/thinking/saying wrong.
The fact that he was even cleaning up that space is a step, I think, since he hasn't touched it for months. And months. He is normally organized and a neat freak and the last few months has been the polar opposite at home anyway (think teenage slob), so to see him spending chunks of time organizing and cleaning, even if it is only in his space, is good I think.
He has been home most of the time when not at work for probably close to about a month now. Granted, he is usually hiding in his cave. He interacts much, much better with the kids as of late. Yet with me he now seems even a bit more withdrawn, but maybe that is my perception because of expectations. That is why it is so confusing.
And as you said, FHS, if he was sick with anything else I wouldn't leave him so why would I now? When I am able to remember that it is easier to keep it in perspective.
I try to focus on and be happy when I see H and not be too bent out of shape by the alien.
