First Piecing Thread

[Hope4us]

H4U,

I'm glad to hear you are coming through this great. I mentioned before that your W and my W are very similar. Right now she's in the cold, distant phase but I'm seeing more of her old self emerge.

Is that how it was in your sitch? Did you try flirting with your W when you saw her softening?

Hey Stuck, thanks for stopping by.

Hmmmm, lets see. I have looked in on your sitch from time to time but I don't remember it very well. I'll take a look at it and get up to speed while I'm out of town this week, but yes, I did start to flirt when I saw her softening.

She was in an extremely cold place for a good 2-3 months after I exposed to the kids. And when she finally started talking to me again, it was a good 2-3 more months until I felt comfortable enough to begin trying to "draw her back in" as Coach says.

I was VERY careful to make sure she was in the mood to receive the flirting and if I did flirt and she made it obvious that I had misread her mood, I backed off immediately. And I started with just very minor flirting. I would walk past her and just lightly brush her on an arm or leg or where ever. Make comments about how great she looked and leave it at that.

Then as I started to see more signs of her old self, I started ramping up the flirting and body contact. I started resting my hand on her leg while we were driving. I could tell if she was in the mood to receive more because if she was, she'd put her hand close to my hand on her leg and ever so slowly move her hand so there was hand contact. If she didn't, shortly after that I would do something that required that hand and then remove it from her leg and not put it back.

I think the key is to let her drive how much and when the flirting, body contact, etc happens. And NEVER let her see you're disappointed that there's not more. NEVER!

I'll check out your sitch when I have time and offer my opinions.

Thanks for stopping in.