How do you wait this out?

[Golfgirl1]

Thanks for the positives! I just needed to hear that from someone/anyone. I'm being the "victim" and "woe is me" again and I need to stop that.

You've been on this board since 2001, wow....I also see your location, my h was in the Navy in San Diego and we lived there for almost 2 years. It's a beautiful place.

Just so many memories over 20 years...I will never be able to erase them all. I wanted to grow old with him, to look back in our retirment home and say..."honey, remember when???" and I grieve so much for that loss. I still want to know "why?" Why did this happen and why couldn't I see it coming and do something about it!!!