As usual, Peace...wise words - "sometimes our best choice is to let them go they are not good for us anymore".
For Silent Chrleader - I hadn't thought about what your counselor said before - mourning the loss of the future we agreed on. Today that is so applicable in my situation. My in-laws (soon to be ex in-laws) are celebrating 50 years of marriage today. I am a little sad. I would love to be a part of the celebration as I have been a part of their lives for about 27 years. But I am also thinking that I will never have the opportunity to celebrate a 50th wedding anniversary. I remember saying happy anniversary to my FIL two years ago, right after H left. I asked him how many years he had been married and he said "48 - no big deal". I looked him square in the eye and said "yes it is".
