Tristan. I think you over analyzing each and every interaction with your wife. They are what they are. Reviewing them in retrospect is futile. You cannot go out to the garage, have a smoke, then come back in and say this is what I meant to say. It doesnt work that way.
q: whats my mom's itinerary? a: here it is.
That is going to be the same conversation whether you are dating, married, separated or divorced. Unless it is delivered with a punch to the mouth, what does it matter. Your wife is too busy getting on with her life to sit around figuring out what Tristan meant by "found it."
Just be confident and decisive in what you say. If she doesn't like it. So what. Gotta go goodbye sweet cheeks. 'click.'
Your words alone are not going to get your wife back home. Your actions might. Take her actions for example. The night before she moves out shes screws you then hits you with the "I think it is very possible that we will be together again" line. Man, that sounds positive, still she packed up and left. But it did have a profound effect on you; leaving you concerned about her every word or silence, worrying about compassion and support and trying to diagnosis psychological problems with third party conversations through an Internet bulletin board.
This would be a much more interesting thread if we were analyzing what Tristan is doing to prove to his wife she made the wrong choice; finding out about how she is scrambling and concerned about his every word or silence because of Tristan's new interactions and how her conversations change after she starts to think Tristan moved on and how that destroyed her fantasy of having her cake and eating it too; reading how after two years of living with a wife having an affair, Tristan realizes his wife wasn't all that and a bag of chips, the "loveless" marriage his wife's boyfriend pointed out was not his fault, and how certain actions Tristan might make that are 180 to his current supplicating style will have a more positive affect on the outcome of his relationship.
She moved out, she has a boyfriend, act as if you are single. It is going to hit her like a ton of bricks when she realizes you are no longer there giving her permission to carry on a love affair. It is then she will start to question what is going wrong. That is how this could be improved. SMcQ
