What to do when H doesn't contact?

[RedSoxFan]

I have NO idea what the heck it is all about. Oh and the spelling that was exactly like I wrote it to you. I guess he is learning how to text quite frequently. But the spelling is from his learning disability. And remember I sent him that letter telling him weeks ago that the door is open if or when he would want to come home. It sounds like to me that he wants our D to feel sorry for him or something. And why couldn't he just put his cell number down for her. I have NO reason to call him, I swear he believes that I was the one calling him all of the time in the beginning instead it was him calling me.

Let me know your thoughts.

Lost, Sometimes activity like letter writing makes us feel better...makes us feel like there is more hope. In actuality there is a ton of hope in your situation but the letters are just a small blip on the radar. When I first hit this site and started engaging in this community I hung on every word to find hope...I needed it. I looked at every one of W's actions for hope. The hardest thing for me to get my arms around was not that the DBing process can and does work, it was understanding that it is not a quick fix approach. Suffice it to say I don't have much patience

You have already gotten a bunch of good advice. Like the flight attendants say, put the oxygen mask on yourself first before your children. You are important...for you and for your children. Take care of you first. Next takle care of your children...sounds like you are. Be careful how much you let them get drawn down into the back and forth. Remind them that their father is not well right now, remind them that he loves them, and most importantly make sure they understand that none of this is their fault. H is on his own journey, you can do NOTHING to get him through it. He has to walk this road on his own. If anything, your engaging him will likely make it worse, push him further out, give him more ammo for the stories he might be weaving in his head. No matter how hard you try, you can't know what he's thinking. In all likelihood he doesn't either. Trust me.

You have plenty to do, starting with yourself and with your children. If you feel sorry for him, do it in your journal. If you need to yell at him, do it in your journal.

It's going to take time but we'll be here and you'll be in our thoughts and prayers