NC with wife for one week

[GoBison]

Not a lot going on between W and myself. I am not sure if there is OM there could be or there could not be either way right now my path is the same. Dark as dark can be.

I may have some more insight on what W maybe going through though. Back when the bomb was initially dropped we had just started to try to have kids. Everything was good between and the best it had been in quite sometime. She even said so during the bomb that everythig was great just a month or two before. What happened during that time. Well the fights between her folks intensified and her mom called her to complain about her dad. Bomb and post-bomb W would say things that I did but where actually things that her dad had said to her mom. I tried to point out that it wasn't me and that this has to do with her folks didn't go over well. I worked on me, she moved out and no change, no contact, no softening. Why because she is still dealing with her folks and putting the blame on me. Found out yesterday that after her last sibling went off to college her folks have decided to get a divorce.

So instead of W looking at me for support which she has done for the past 10 years on everything she looks at me as well he is similar to my dad. If we have kids and things end up like my folks we will just get divorced when the kids move out of the home in 20 years.

I am sure that she is hurting from our M as well as her folks M. As much as I would like to reach out to her and be there for her I know that I can't. She needs to figure things out on her own and me keeping my distance will hopefully allow her to see that her anger is not with me.

Not saying that there is not things that I can do to be a better husband there is and those are the things that I have worked on and will continue to do in the future. Looking at her folks I can see how her mom beat down her dad and pushed him around. The same things happened in our M and I did not stand up were I needed to as I thought it best to go with the flow. If and thats a big if right now she does decide to work on our M things will be different and I will come out of this stronger, more assertive and with more confidence than a few months ago.