How do you wait this out?

[brandnewday]

So what things did your Husband like to do?

We already know he doesn't like golf.

So what was he doing while you were off golfing?

What are some of his hobbies?

What did you do together as a couple?

Did he ever mention things he wanted to do but you just blew it off?

[pearlharbr]

Yep. The weather is still nice enough to get out on the course. BF is going out with his work buddies Sat afternoon. I'm sure there are many tee times that aren't filled, you can slip in and be a fourth. It could just be a boring round (in which case you're working on your game) or you could meet some interesting people!

You could come over and help me work on rehabbing my closet. That's what I'll be doing on Saturday!

Tonight is the start of football season. Do you like the sport at all? Go to a bar to have dinner and watch the game. Sit at the bar. I guarantee you someone will strike up a conversation. By the end of the season last year I knew all the bartenders and one saw me come in and made my drink without asking. Plus men love to talk to women who really know their sports. Just saying, it's an easy way to meet people.

[Golfgirl1]

LOVE sports..playing,watching, whatever. Just got in a fantasy football "pick the winners" thing....

I'm just not really a 'bar' kind of person...never have been. I still have trouble being around lots of people and seeing happy couples all over the place. Will get easier I suppose.

[Golfgirl1]

He like motorcycle riding and shooting his guns, both of which I had no problem doing. We went to movies and out to dinner as a couple. We also hiked with our dogs and spent time at our cabin.

[Golfgirl1]

Nope, I'm pretty open to trying new things...he didn't mention anything to me. I was the one who initiated almost everything, otherwise we just sat home.

[brandnewday]

Did he prefer just sitting home?

And honestly....when you initiated things how did he respond?

Did he ever have to be convinced to do whatever it was?

[pearlharbr]

I'm just not really a 'bar' kind of person...never have been.

Perfect. This is a great opportunity to do something different. You love sports and everyone else there loves sports. In my experience there aren't a whole lot of happy couples cooing at each other at a sports bar when a game is on. And men who aren't there with women are impressed with a single woman being there. Even if they aren't hitting on you they will talk to you about the game.

brandnewday, I don't understand what your questions have to do with GG's current sitch. Are you implying that if she shows interest in H's hobbies now that will lure him back?

I do think it's important to understand the dynamics of the R and recognize improvements that she can make in herself. But IMHO and from my own experience, GG needs to focus on herself right now and not on what her H may or may not want her to do.

[brandnewday]

brandnewday, I don't understand what your questions have to do with GG's current sitch. Are you implying that if she shows interest in H's hobbies now that will lure him back?

I do think it's important to understand the dynamics of the R and recognize improvements that she can make in herself. But IMHO and from my own experience, GG needs to focus on herself right now and not on what her H may or may not want her to do.

Part of focusing on herself would be to also make changes.
I think she is trying to save her Marriage, and not return to the "same" thing she had before.

But maybe I am wrong....

[brandnewday]

Oh and Pearl....

From reading your dates, if you are piecing, now, then your boyfriend wasn't MLC.

Things in MLC are so very different then WAS.
Things are also different when you are married.

[Golfgirl1]

My h did prefer to sit at home. He recently said how "painfully shy" he really is, but I didn't see that....guess that's something to really listen to. He doesn't like any sports, so going to Rockies or Broncos games is usually out of the question. He hated skiing. I wanted to play on a coed softball team...nope he didn't want to do that (I am now playing on one). What he complains about is all of the "compromising" he did in the m. Apparently he didn't want the cabin either. I suggested all kinds of things and he did go along with the things and I thought he had a good time, but I don't think he ever wanted to do those things. Eventually I just stopped being the "cruise director" and then he complained that we stopped doing fun things! I can't seem to win here...

My friends say "who is GG really?" I'm trying to find out...