Hi Being,

You know this weekend that is exactly what I was thinking about - compassion!!! After reading so many books on the Dai Lama and the Tao, I was thinking that my discomfort with the little girl being involved with H really shows no compassion. Then the other side of me says, but how much compassion can one person exhibit. I guess teh Dali Lama would say an endless amount right. So yes, I so thought that I'm not being compassionate. After I thought H he did good this weekend, I even said go ahead maybe I'm trying to make you go to hell. H says that we never know later years that the little girl might thank him that he wasn't her father but he still showed her love. So will see how it goes. I just know that if I even push it I guess I will look like the mean evil one.

And YES it is absolutely annoying having her call all the time. H has changed his # numerous times, for a while our families were saying that he ph # must be giving away for free smile. But of course he had to give it back, and especially when he goes back to being involved with ow. I remember the last time he said he would change his # I just told him don't even bother. He will have to give it to her for emergencies anyway. But I've made a decision that I'm not going to let her calling him upset my mood anymore, it use to cause big arguments. I truly feel that there is little he can do to stop her. She is on a mission, and I know it.

So this whole situation is too much to handle and I constantly ask myself why am I still involved in this. Moving on seems so much more attractive. God knows how I've try to move on...