The interview didn't go so well. The job just didn't fit my experience, I just don't know much about radio frequency stuff.
However, the interview with another company I had today went very well. The hiring manager said I will definitely be getting a call from him. It will be a couple of weeks before they can make an offer because they are waiting to finalize a contract that will expand their business by about 60%..... There's a catch though, I think I would have to start on a night shift...sigh. We'll see what the offer is and go from there.
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I finally got to talk one on one with our MC about my affairs/indiscretions. She wants me to go to a sex addicts anonymous meeting because much of my past behavior was compulsive, which I agreed to do. It did feel good to be able to talk to her about it.
We are still working through the hurt I have caused my W. It isn't easy and some anger boils up every now and then from both of us. She still loves me though and that's what makes me think that there is hope for us. We continue to ML even as the details come out that she wants to know about.
W was asking me how I was feeling after talking to our MC and about her wanting me to go to SAA. I told her it makes me feel broken and defective, like something is wrong with me. Keeping the secrets gave the appearance that I was a "good man", when in reality I was "no good" at all. Living in denial for so long got to be a bad habit, "It's not so bad, as long as I can keep my secret and protect my loved ones from the awful truth, It will all be fine." I was hurting myself and my loved ones, I was only fooling myself.
Our MC has great hope for our situation because of the love that my W and I share for each other. Our willingness to both work hard and to find answers. I think W is working harder than I am now.
I'm not sure I would have been able to face all of this if it weren't for everyone here supporting me along the way. You know I love all of you all here for that.
