You'll never see me fall from grace

[Sugar and Spice]

Thanks to all for your insight and help. Once we were both able to step back from it, he actually said that he needed to schedule something for them to do together or find something they both could enjoy together. So my message got through, I just always forget that H processes things slower than I do and its best not to overload him with too much.

We have been getting along better than ever & he actually told me that he feels that we are closer now than we have ever been since this all started. Though its nice to hear and I feel mostly the same, I am still very cautious (his word). I have told him that I've been burnt one too many times and I just can't throw it all in the mix again only to have my heart ripped out, so we are reconnecting slowly. I have finally started to see the man I fell in love with. I guess being so close I didn't realize how long things had actually been bad...scary.

He has been working overtime every other week and was unable to take D9mos last week and it started a HUGE fight between H and the Troll. He finally turned his phone off, but in 1 day he had 67 missed calls from her, his vm is filled up and she sent 30 or so text messages. This is not counting the times they actually spoke. She was angry about him not taking the baby, but presented it as he wasn't treating her like he does the older 2. I was really glad that for once she did not contact me and drag me into the middle of it. No vm or anything. I see that as progress, but it got really HATEFUL. He has said that after he gets his B done then he will be getting an atty to set up something more permanent about visitation and such.

Things are looking up, but I know there is a long way to go still.

I got released to go back to work Monday. I'm glad and sad. I need something to do other than look for things to be wrong, but I'll miss hanging out with my kids after school and doing homework and stuff. Oh well.

Hey Kat...theres only 52 days until Halloween! YAY!!!!