I just finished reading Love Must Be Tough (I think that is the name?) and there is a letter in there the author urges the reader to send - A letting go letter - What are your thoughts on this?
What am I going to do or say? Don't know - Right now I am angry that he has apparently discovered "Out of sight, Out of mind" thinking where are children are concerned so if I saw him I may be tempted to hit him with my car ;)(jj)
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
The letter in there was nice and to the point however I haven't written one up yet...
Just between you all here, if I send that letter and he chooses her then I lost and what do I have then? (not that I have much now)
So many websites say so many different things...
Stand for this, kneel for that, put the A out in the open, keep it in the dark, be mean, be nice, be loving, don't be a doormat, be a doormat, treat WAS with love, kindness, respect, treat WAS like they are a piece of crap etc...WTH are we really doing?
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
Who really knows what you should do! I sure as heck don't!!
So for me it was choosing the path that I thought GOD would want me to take. It's so hard though. Especially when you get an eight page letter of projection! It was cold! It was hateful! So full of woe is me and this is all your fault we are where we are. So uncharacteristic of what H was like before this all started.
(((Hugs))) to you my friend...I have been reading your post and I am sorry about the letter...Dang these men!
Glad I can still make someone laugh
He texted me tonight after 7 days of no contact...Wasn't a good time...My Pastor called and emailed me wanting to know how he can help...I am basically once again in tears and boom here comes H with a text talking about how is everyone? I said good...You? He says Ok... I said I want to ask you a question and I want an honest reply... He says Sure I said How did we fall so far and where do we go from here... He says He doesn't know... I said To either question? Then said (I know Puppy is going to kill me for this) What do you want? What will make you happy? I know what I want however I now know I can't make you come back..If you want out, I will no longer fight you. His response was.."Talk about it later"
Then he went back into his hole probably with the FT sitting right there and I am once again so lost.
Now What?
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
It is great that there is so much marriage restoration/DBing advice out there but a lot of it is conflicting and if you try to take in all of it, it is very confusing. And face it. all of the advice will not pertain any one situation. You have to weed one what does not apply to you. At the end of the day it is a decision only you can make.
The way I see it, they walked away, they have to walk back in. Without pursuit, without drama, without R talk. Of their own volition and because they want it. You asked if he chooses her what will you have? Well, I hope you get a new M with him. But you will always have you and your sons. AND you have life and that is full of endless possibilities! If you really are committed to your M do not let the length of the wait get to you. I think the waiting is necessary if they are to clear the fog. What you do while you wait will make or break you.
"What you do while you wait will make or break you." I really needed to hear this today...I have been feeling like I am crumbling under the pressure and these words were just what I needed.
(((Hugs)))
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
