I was up bright and early this morning as I had to take S to work as he is picking up his new car today afterwards. Sleep wasnt too bad woke up twice and started to mither about H having someone else, but managed to move my mind away and go back to sleep, dont ask me how though. Thankfully being busy first thing stopped any thoughts of H although I did check my email but then realise on the way to take S to work that H would even be at work yet, and as yet doesnt have any net facilities at his home appart from using his phone which will become very expensive.. But as the banking password is still changed I expect I will hear from him soon. Although Im seriously thinking of changing it back now, just dont know what to do on that one.
I have a docs appointment this morning have to go every month whilst on these tablets it seems, although at least its the doc I first saw as second visit was with another and she wasnt really interested or helpful.
Weather here was rubbish to start with but looks like its clearing now so will probably go and ride madam at lunch time. If it doesnt I might pop out shopping and look for a top for the party/bbq Im going to on saturday.
Pit of the stomach sick feeling is still there on and off, I try and stamp it back down again when it rises up, radio on in the car is good stops me from thinking whilst Im listening and hopefully laughing. Im just really feeling the loss of H wanted to make contact/see with me today, we were so close and now nothing for a whole week, but then if my OW theory is correct he is busy with her now, so has no need for me!
____________________________
W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
