Over the Shock and GALing 6

[Thinker]

She says "God your dad is F...ked up! He's such a .....", which leaves me saying / thinking "Back off!! that's my family you are talking about!!"

I understand and think it is a good approach. I struggle with agreeing with her.

Oh, I thought you wanted to solve the problem and have a better relationship with your wife. I guess agreeing with her so that she feels heard and understood would be going against your princieples huh?

Thanks Gucci,

I think you misunderstood what I was trying to say. I agree with the approach you suggested. It is correct. I also agree with my wife that my Dad often acts like a jerk.

The struggle I was referring to is with the instinctive defensive reaction I have when she is vehemently attacking my family (and me by proxy??). I find it difficult to agree with her at in the heat of the discussion at that moment. My initial reaction is to fight back against her tone and her language rather than to agree with her statements. I'll solve that.

You are right, however. I have historically left her feeling alone in this. She only recently started voicing her emotions in this area, but it has apparently been building for a long time.