Hey T.. I wish I had been able to function more normally whilst he was gone! I feel a bit embarressed at the depressed, desperate state I was in for much of it. Of course, I then started to feel better.. and he was more of a depressed desperate state than me anyway, and also feels embarressed about that, so I probably shouldnt worry! I think in terms of DBing, the one thing that definetly doesnt work (or wouldnt in my case) would be to get an OM yourself. My bf is the sort of guy that would have stood back, or let me be and felt he had no right to break it up if he had wanted me back, so I probably would never have known. He has said to me, he worried sick I would find someone else and wouldnt have blamed me if I had, so I assume he means he would have assumed he had lost me and stepped aside if I had of done.
So I am glad I didnt.. but I wish I had spared myself some misery and had a little platonic fun at least. As for children.. yes, I thikn I am finally ready! I am done with the career/college striving, so I am turning down the place I won at college to go on and study more. Now all I need to do is find out from bf what he has in mind for us.. marriage? kids? I dont want to suggest to him, I want him to arrive at those conclusions by himself, be a man and make the decision. So quite a 180 for me there!
