Divorce not busted 3

[Orich]

I am trying to figure out what the opposite of what I am doing right now is. This strikes me: One of the complaints W had when we went to MC was my not helping around the house. Laundry, cleaning, etc. I started to really pay attention to the laundry, the dishwasher, garbage days, etc. By the time we stopped going to MC, she had said she noticed and appreciated my changes.
I have gotten to the point where I am happy with the changes, and I notice other things around the house and act on them automatically. I often clean the table after dinner, if I find anything in the sink I will wash it. I have noticed that often times W will say I don't have to clean the table, she will do it, or I sat down all day at work, let me clean the table. Last night her dad was eating with us after I grilled dinner. He said something to the effect of now the cook has to clean. W chimed in and said in a sort of annoyed voice, well he doesn't have to, I can do it, too. She then started gathering the dirty dishes to bring inside and wash.
Am I doing too much? Am I "upstaging" her? I honestly am not doing it to get a positive reaction to her, I just want a clean house, so I do what I can when I can.
Also, during the block party I helped her with running certain aspects of the day. She seemed pretty receptive. I saw her beginning to stress, so I jumped in. Should I not have?
Finally, yesterday I wanted to grill for Labor day. I asked her what she would like, I even offered to make fish for her (which I don't like to do on the grill) She told me she had no appetite and it didn't matter, and she didn't feel like eating anyway. So, I got a couple of steaks and grilled those.
Rather than forget about grilling and just heating something up for me and the boys because of her not wanting a real dinner, I went ahead to the store, bought the food and cooked.