I haven't read your thread completely in a few weeks, but I do not think you should move out of the house. This is her party, so SHE should be the one to find a new place. Don't make this easy on her by moving out.
I agree with everything giving said. It's her affair, her filing for D, and her breaking up the family, but you should move out of your house???? She's trying to guilt you into doing what she wants, but believe it it is her choices that will be affecting the kids. If she gives a crap about the kids, tell her she should give up the OM and work on the marriage. See how much she cares about them then....
Divorce will affect the kids. Pretending everything is going to stay the same is just that; a pretense. Re: the kids school. Are they old enough to ride a bus? Could you hire a babysitter in the afternoons? There are many different ways you could handle that, including her getting an apt. and having the kids there. That will happen after divorce, believe it.
