I hope you told your C that you don't have those advantages of being widowed since you care for both your mom and your son. Doesn't she know your situation? Sheesh. Lol.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
Yeah, she knows. She was telling me what she found beneficial and trying to get me to think of things but I couldn't come up with one positive. Now that I think about it, there is one positive....I don't have to do his laundry anymore! It was NASTY!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
How about you plan a week's worth of menus that YOU like and get help preparing them. Your mom and kid will manage to both help prepare and eat them AND they'll be healthier. The martyrdom for unhealthy meals isn't really good for anyone, lol
Start cooking what you want to eat, now and then. Giving Marc what he wants isn't doing him any favors. Those eating habits can literally kill him. (OK, that sounds dramatic, but seriously, if it's not good for you, it's not good for him.) The same is true for your mom, for that matter.
You do have the power to stop being the martyr, one step at a time. You don't have to try to please everyone else all the time. You've fallen into a trap. It's not easy, but you can dig yourself out.
You don't have to tell Gabe where you are or when you'll be home.
You don't have to cook what he wants.
You don't have to do his laundry.
You don't have to pick up his shoes, underwear, etc etc etc.
You don't have to clean the bathroom after him, make room for his toothbrush, etc.
You have more space for yourself.
And I totally agree with Jeff's point about the food. Start making their favorite meals more of a treat than an everyday thing. It'll benefit all of you.
(((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))))
Enjoy the time off!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
It's not that what I make for them is bad, it's usually pretty healthy. The problem is that it's time consuming and involves more quantity than I want to prepare. I'd rather have a cup of soup and a salad but if they don't have meat, starch and a vegetable they feel deprived. Ugh. I'll work on it more. I really am tired of pleasing everyone but myself dang it!
I like your list Michelle! I never picked up Gabe's clothes, but having to wash them was a nightmare. Super stink!
OT - mom can't help prepare anything. She's unable to see, can't sit anywhere but in her recliner for more than a few minutes so just sitting at the table to cut up veggies is nearly impossible for her (plus the whole problem of her possibly cutting of a finger comes to mind!). I've tried getting Marc to help but he's more of a hinderance than a help. Not sure how he's every going to feed himself in the future! He's probably going to have to live off of microwave dinners. ICK!
Heading out to the first home football game of the season at Marc's high school. Hope you all have a FAB night and I'll see y'all later! Go Panthers!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Make 3 times what you need and eat left-overs for a day or two. Plan some crock-pot/slow-cooker stews (did you know you can make lasagna in one????). That way it doesn't require as much time/effort from you - throw it in the pot and go to work, come home and dinner is done!
I'm sure your mom can keep an eye on a slow cooker if you don't have/get one with a timer.
Hmmmm what else....oh yeah, grilled cheese, soup, and salad is a great quick meal.
And guess what - they'll have to live with whatever you make since they won't do it themselves! So pffffft to them.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
They don't have to have a meat a starch and a veggie! Especially in the quantities I bet they are eating the meat and starch!
Slow cooker meals are an excellent plan! You can stretch the meat, and sneak in extra veggies, and they'll hardly know! And it can be less work for you, and better for everyone!
