So my wife grows up in house continually tormented by brother. Eventually moves out to dads and then college. During this time has a string of relationships...nothing special. Graduates college and marries a guy with MS. Wife works hard to make life for herself, while husband blames all his problems on MS and does little or nothing. Relationship eventually turns verbally and physically abusive. Wife begins affair with her best friends husband (compulsive cheater that was sleeping with at least two other woman than my wife and his wife). My wife moves out of her house into an apartment....first time she is really alone and able to do her thing with no responsibilities. Six months later I come along and sweep her off her feet. I told her right away that I wanted marriage...spooks her, but I am what she needs at that time. Her divorce is finalized and we move into her house. A year later, the night before my college graduation, she proposes to me! Then we go though a few boring years of just good relationship stuff.
We decide to have a baby (big chore since there were medical issues) and have a son. He is has chronic ears problems etc. Things are still good between us. Two years later we try for number two. During her pregnancy she starts having problems controlling our son (now 2), at one point he actually attacks her, and she has a breakdown. She is transferred to a new office about 1.5 hours away and is driving daily to work. She quits her job and decides to be a SAHM. I support it, though scared because my pay is low at this point.
Through the next few years, sex decreases, but we are still good. The usually romantic husband and wife stuff. My wife continues to have problems with our son. Can't control him and I am not to good at dealing with it either (son eventually diagnosed with ADD).
In lure of more money and lack of snow, we move south. I get big raise, but also work a lot more. Wife does okay, makes a lot of new friends, goes out regularly, etc. We still seem to be okay, but problems continue with our son.
Year later we move farther south. Problems start right away. Wife can't make friends, etc. Meets GF (another compulsive cheater...has slept with at least 5 married people that I know of) and it goes from there down hill to were we are today.
At this point my wife doesn't want to be a mother or wife. She loves her daughter dearly, but really has no relationship with our son. I feel that our son reminds her of her brother. Our relationship is very different in comparison to most on here. There have been some tense battles, but a lot less than the norm. She has actually expressed remorse more than once! She has also stated I am a marvelous man and a great father! But she wants to be free of the responsibility of being a wife and mother. So I end up here preparing for separation....making some kick butt marinara and meatballs.
Lola-Read your story....very interesting and how you handled it...extraordinary...I feel lucky to have your insight
Searching-Still catching up on yours...but thank you for the comments and know that I do hear what you are saying
It is just so out of the norm...not that being on this board is normal...lol. There is a better break down in my old threads. Of course initially I thought it was all about the affair, but now I know better. So I live day by day...trying to be as detached as possible. Most days I succeed, some days I fail.
