I'm glad that you were merely venting here while feeling very frustrated. Cheating is never the answer you know. In theory, it sounds like a pretty good idea but it never quite turns out that way in real life. Too many complications. Take for example, my H had a PA once with a co-worker. Well it was supposed to be merely physical, no strings attached kind of thing, the kind of thing you were thinking about. As it turned out the OW became very emotional, so emotional she threatened suicide and started harrassing me. She would call me up at home in the middle of the night then hang up and even rang my office just to hang up. When that was not good enough, she finally came to my home to deliver to me personally a long x-rated letter about what they had been doing behind my back and this was one year after the A ended! Who knows, lets say if you do hook up with this other man who is also married, you may even turn out to be the emotional one.
Like I said at the beggining of the post, its really hard having to deal with this SSM thing. I think if I was 30 years into my M and still had this issue to deal with I too would say the same thing you did out of frustration. Whats left to do? Leave or if thats not the answer for you, live with it. The other option, change (find a compromise) is only available to us if our spouses were willing. It takes two hands to clap. LH
