TAL, You are a beautiful and strong woman. You do not deserved to be treated like this. Does your H have somewhere he can go? I do think you need some time and space between you. You have tried so hard to make your marriage work. Who knows maybe there is still a chance, but right now I think you he both need breaks to assess the situation. I so wish I was close enough to help you out.
Hugs, Yoyo
Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. -- Bernice Johnson Reagon