Journaling: Thursday morning: D6 started kindergarten this morning. She woke up early, I woke up with her and helped get her lunch ready. W came up after lunch was made and said thank you. We were watching Talia pick out her clothes and my wife looks at me and says: "I know you can't give me a hug, but I am going to give you one and wraps her arms around me." She then follows D6 out of the room.
I sat there thinking that sounded very demeaning. After about a minute, I walked into the bathroom. M: "It's not that I can't" W: "I understand." M: "It's that I won't." W: "OK. I understand." M: "What you are doing is very destructive to our family." W: "Do we need to talk about this now. You are bursting my bubble. Lets just focus on the girls right now." - She was now agitated
I walk out and go downstairs for a while. When she came down, I acted as nothing happened. We both escort D6 to kindergarten (they asked parents to join children on first day). W didn't talk much during the event. We walked back and conversed a little, nothing big.
In general, I am feeling pretty good. I know this confidence stuff is coming slowly, but I think I am moving in the right direction. Thank you all for the criticism. I need it. It makes me a better man.
