Some of the philosophies/principles on the site are contradictory…do not contact WAS…yet let them see you are strong, confident & getting on with your life just fine without them. How can you do the latter without the former
I've struggled with this a little too but it seems to have a natural progression. NC will lead to curiosity and observation from afar. In reality many of us have to have some contact with kids, etc. so there are opportunities there to demonstrate confidence and happiness. The challenge is not overdoing it Seems to me that any attempts at maintaining any contact solely for the purpose of demonstrating confidence is #1 easy to see through and #2 doesn't allow the process to unfold naturally. Timing is key with this stuff. I was a WAH. Now I'm back asking W to reconcile and the tables are turned. When I was in the middle of my crisis she tried to talk sense to me in every way possible. I was an alien and I just couldn't/didn't get any of it. But when I was ready and the switch went off I knew it. Now I know that I have to look at W's situation the same way.
Be patient and be an awesome choice when the switch flips...that's my goal!
Last edited by RedSoxFan; 09/03/0903:26 PM.
AKA: "Ben the school teacher" --- Me:45, W:41 | Ds:10,12&14 | M:18, T:20 Me: MLC+PA+WAS+Separated 10/08 My Request to Reconcile Denied 7/09 W w/OM 6/09-11/09
Seems to me that any attempts at maintaining any contact solely for the purpose of demonstrating confidence is #1 easy to see through and #2 doesn't allow the process to unfold naturally. Timing is key with this stuff. I was a WAH. Now I'm back asking W to reconcile and the tables are turned. When I was in the middle of my crisis she tried to talk sense to me in every way possible. I was an alien and I just couldn't/didn't get any of it. But when I was ready and the switch went off I knew it. Now I know that I have to look at W's situation the same way. 
