I have decided to start a new thread for HD wives, girlfriends etc to come and vent. I noticed that of late there are a lot more of "us" out here. I think that it is a little harder for us women to be the HD spouse than the men because it is against the norm or what society view as the norm. If the men find it hard to have to initiate, pursue and "beg" for sex it is a lot harder for a woman, believe me. I think that in a SSM there are only two things you can do. You either choose to live with it or you leave. If you expect change, you're in for a long haul and most likely will be disappointed.
Ok, I'll start off the venting now girls. First a little history. H and I have been together for 10 years and we're married for 2 1/2 years. I am now 2 months pregnant and we have another little girl aged 1 1/2. we lived together for about 4-5 years before we married. It was only the last year of living together before marriage that I noticed the difference in our libido. It has only gotten worse after I became pregnant and had a child. I did everything I could to set things right, talked about it nicely for months at first and when that still didn't work became very frustrated and started arguing about it. That only made things worse and started threatening other areas of my marriage that were right and wonderful to begin with. I also tried to change myself, be less naggy etc and tried my best to make H happy without the pressure. I thought I was doing such a good job too. Well as it turned out, I wasn't. H and I had a big argument over the weekend and I found out that none of the things I thought I was doing so well felt that way to him at all. Hence my starting this new thread.
Oh, I feel rather miserable right now. H told me a lot of things in our argument. He told me that he was tired of me complaining all the time, about not having sex, about him not wanting to read the 'love languages' book I bought for us, about him not helping me enough around the house and with the baby and now about my morning sickness. He says he is not longer sympathetic about it with me as I have exhausted all my avenues with him by complaining all the time. He told me to be a stronger person and even told me I could go and have an affair or whatever if that is what it will take to leave him alone. Oh wow! And all this time he put on such a happy face and I thought I was doing a good job in being a good wife.
I really don't know what to do now. I guess I will just leave him alone like he wants and concentrate on coping without asking him for help since he wants me to be stronger. Divorce is not an option for me so I suppose I will just have to make the best of everything and live with the sitch.
What does everyone else think? All the HD wives are welcome to vent here as much as they want. LH
