I feel like I am operating in a vacuum

[cville22901]

I feel like I am self-flagellating at this point.

The depression has become a comfort zone that makes me miserable, but, for some reason, I prefer to remain in it. I know that there are steps that I need to take to get out of it, but I seize up when I attempt to make them.

I know that depression involves a series of choices. Why do I continue to make the depressed choices? Is it because of the pay offf? What is the pay off? Pity and attention from other people? That's not much of a personality to offer to others.

I am very tired right (again) now from the meds.