Had a long discussion with W which was pretty emotional for her. She mentioned her books and wanted me to know about them but didn't want me to find them and get upset. I kind of smiled and she seemed surprised; I guess she was expecting me to flip out. But I don't look at the books as another nail in the coffin; she can read whatever she wants.
I pressed her about her time away where I knew the OM was with her. She was very hesitant in talking about it, beating around the bush. Finally admitted they spent the night together with other people. I told her this was unacceptable and that this sh## had to stop. It's disrespectful to me, our kids, and our marriage.
I told her "you know how I feel about your contact with him" and she said "I DON'T know because you never tell me" so I proceeded to tell her in very firm tones the way I feel about it. She was very quiet and listened.
It was a very productive conversation after a couple of days of coldness and relative silence. A much better conversation than I expected; I really thought she'd say that she's moving more towards divorce and is preparing for that. She didn't. She seemed to want to downplay her books as something she's reading "just in case" and wanted to make sure I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. I think she's surprised that I would react so cavalierly toward them.
In any case, things warmed up after the conversation.
WAW Using God Me-43 W-40 M-14 S-11 S-9 D-7 EABomb 5/09 Separated 12/09
