Rabbit - STOP. You are falling in to all the same traps as other newbies (and I have been there too)!!
Let's go bit by bit:
You must think before you react - that's why you now feel that you could have written a better reply! You reacted.
I saw your 'last bit' as accusing (sorry!) and he would have too - even though you say that you were agreeing with him.
Forget the Italian lessons for now ... more important things to deal with. You have to get yourself a life and he probably feels that learning Italian is GAL'ing for him ... put that one on the back burner, refocus, get your ducks in a row and we can tackle that one later. BIG LESSON ... don't worry about what H is doing, only what YOU are doing.
H is in control of finances at this time and if he is worried about unusual activity on the account, let him sort it out. Not your problem, especially when you should be focusing on your interview this afternoon (Good luck!). You do not need the extra stress. Let H sort it out and whilst he plans to call you later, "sorry but you are busy - could he call you tomorrow, instead"?? I know that you are screaming now that this is not the right thing, but it is. BELIEVE - HAVE FAITH - DETACH LOVINGLY. Go be calm, proactive and as happy as a horse, not sick as a dog!
This is day five of his reactions leaving you reeling? YOUR FAULT - don't allow his actions to do that to you. Remember, this is not about him, it's about you. You have the power to deflect his actions and if he sees you reeling, who is winning??
You have to pull things together quickly here or you are in serious jeopardy of losing control. Take back the reigns, remember that? It's all about choice - your choice. You must choose not to let H upset you and the way you do that is to put up a big red stop sign in your mind and pay heed to it. Then, breath, be calm and do not react. It's the best start. Remember your 180's .. he's expecting this behaviour from you and you are playing in to his hands. STOP NOW. I did say that it felt weird and wouldn't be easy, didn't I??!!!
OK - let me jump to post two ...
Last edited by Eskimo Nell; 09/02/0909:18 AM.
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
