I agree that it is best that she moves out for everyone. It is weird watching the kids around her. When I was in therapy, I told the therapist I felt like "I have to walk on eggshells all the time". I can see it in the kids now. Since I started my business, the family desk has become my realm and my wife had to get her "own" computer which sits at the kitchen table. My daughter will usually color at the kitchen table, but when my wife is home....she colors at the table very rarely. This weekend she actually sat under the office chair I was sitting in and colored.
I do agree that db'ing is no guarantee to saving a marriage...I see it much more as saving yourself. I think I have achieved that during this process. There were things in my life that needed changing and that I have changed...such as working too much. The big downfalls that I have in reality are more fatigue driven. I do to much and then burn out. Since I have no family in the area, I can't even use them as a respite from my children or life. Then to have somebody who should be helping just waltzing in and out on a whim...is frustrating. How to you tell an adult...stay home with your kids if they don't want too? I mean really...lock the door and drive away before they can? I live in a community state, so I can't lock or kick her out. She has to leave on her own and the sooner the better for all.
On to the good news....great soccer practice today. I am coaching my daughters team. Just imagine...a 6'4"..245 ex-hockey and football player coaching a bunch of dainty 7 year old soccer players. I have seven girls on the team and four of them have been playing for over 4 years. In the field next to us was a 12 year old girls team and the coach came over and just said "they are impressive". Good passing and good defense. I fear that I might have to hold them back once games start...they are that good! Just got both the kids showered and bathed...time for them to hit the hay. My wife is currently out so things are peaceful and quiet.
I just went back and reread my posts today...what a WOW moment. I know that what I described is a very brief synopsis, but WOW. Another side bar point...I don't really trust my wife with the kids alone. So if I could sneak out, I am nervous about what might happen. She isn't abusive, but has had outbursts that have been beyond scary. Time to put the kids to bed!
