NC with wife for one week

[Ready2Change]

... She wants to discuss Money, Selling the house and I am sure filing for D.

What you believe will be your truth. You create your own reality. You believe she will discuss D.... Guess what? What do you want from the meeting?

How about enjoying being in the presence of your W (no matter how she is acting or what she is say)? Look into her eyes and think about how beautiful they are. Look at her lips and think about kissing them. Listen to every word like it is an interesting story. Validate what she says. Do not agree to things you do not agree with. Ya ya ya, easy for me to say. Hard for me to do....It took me awhile to do that. MsR2C believes I am a dumbass. Yes I understand that. I validate her feelings. I listen to her story. That does not mean it is true, but I do understand her POV.

1) Tell her this is silly and that we really need to work this out.

This completely invalidates what she believes. Validate.

2) Tell her that I think that this is the best thing as it was completely disrespectful of her the way that she treated me and her being not happy and immediately wanting a divorce is disrespectful and I do not know why I tolerated it for so long. I was a good husband and do not deserve to be treated such a way that everytime my wife is unhappy she goes looking elsewhere to be happy. And that I will not let my next wife disrespect me like that.

I feel this is full of blame.

express feelings without defending.
hold your boundaries.
Project confidence and happiness.
Tough love. - Empathy, natural consequences

Less words the better. Listen, validate, understand. Compassion.

"I feel we can be happy together, but if D is what you truly want, than I will not stand in your way"

I can spontaneously smile (at any time) by thinking about a very pleasurable moment in my life (that occurred many months ago). Practice this before the meeting. If you start getting sucked into the fear of D, Think your positive thought and smile. And enjoy look at your W.