But, the goal...I don't have one anymore other than handling my life with sanity and civility and setting small goals that I can meet.
Where H fits in this, I'm not sure. But, I know I do not feel good this morning, so that's a clue.
I responded to the text but not the email invitation.
I'm kind of on the other side of the fence from you AAK. Kind of where your husband is. My hope/wish for W would be that she either decides that she's 100% finished with me or that she decides what criteria might allow her to consider having me back and be diligent about allowing things to evolve and unfold in a way that is safe and fair for everyone.
I get that this is idealistic and unreasonable for me to expect this but that's what I would wish for. Just seems to me that if either or both parties can have a plan it would increase the likelihood of a better outcome.
Absolutely, but I had a plan and it failed and I was miserable. I have a very clear understanding of what happened with us. He knows my expectation for a marriage with him would require us to do specific things with me...
I have not gotten ONE word that indicates he wants or is ready to get back together.
All I have is that when I pull away, he comes toward me...that's it.
If he said he wanted to get back together, that might be different.
If he came to me with a plan...that would be hot hot hot.
If he wants to date me, he can treat me like a lady...the invitation was a start.
So, to be clear, you are where my H MAY be eventually, but he has no where near the level of contrition, clarity or understanding that you do.
Some people are dense and they require it spelled out for them, it sucks but hey communication between the 2 of you may actually be improved if you told him what you wanted (not needed, there is a difference) from him if ever wanted to make this work.
