I had this realization this realization last night, that all the things I do that make me happy, I do alone. I have friends here in my new city but most of the things I do for me, involve only me. I'm not sure why that is, exactly. I am introverted by nature, so I like and need the alone time, but all alone can't be good.
Hey, dude! I finally found your thread.
Just like everything else in all of this (even in life!), it's that all-important BALANCE.
Yes, you are right- all alone can't be good. But all "together" can't be good either, yes?
When I first began to get a grip on all of this, I spent a LOT of time with family and friends. I finally figured out that, while I did kind of feel better, there was something.....missing.
For me, that something missing was the "down time". It turns out that I was so busy with spending time with friends, that I was not giving myself the alone time I needed to process the grief I was feeling.
In effect, I was avoiding my issues by trying to cover up what was wrong with "good times"........
...just like my W.
I started to spend a lot more time alone...and I started to heal that "missing" part. I watched myself like a hawk, and eventually, the fear that I initially had about possibly slipping into a hermit-like depression slowly faded. Now, I feel I have a good balance between "face time" and "me time". But I had to learn to find that delicate equilibrium.
Don't overly concern yourself with "shoulds"- "I should get out more", "I should spend time with such-and-such", "I should go out and do X". Take the type of time that you need for your processing- whatever that may be. You'll know how much you need when you get there.
PATIENCE AND FORTITUDE CONQUER ALL THINGS. -Ralph Waldo Emerson
DBing and MLC take their toll....Please provide exact CHANGE. -Jimbo
