We were both home Saturday. Some time was spent with eachother, but she kept cycling from almost normal to really angry/depressed. She left to go to GF's house for a bit while I was with S7 and neighborhood kids.
When we came back, she was there sobbing on "my" (formerly our) bed. She told me she didn't want me to hurt her anymore. She's been so hurt and angry. She didn't realize how angry she has been. She sees that she has been walled off to me and defensive against me. She's sick of living like this and is ready to bring the wall down.
We hugged. We cried.
She said she couldn't promise what the future will look like, and she doesn't feel the closeness with me that she should. I told her that I don't feel that right now either, but that we shouldn't expect to feel that right now. We have been through a lot and it will take some effort to get there, but we can get there.
We took a break from the R talk after that. We both needed a breather.
I had plans that night. I kept them. She was up when I got home (12:30 ish.). We chatted about the evening, but no R talk. She went back to "her" room that night.
Sunday - she spent plenty of time to herself doing projects around the house, shopping etc. No R talk. No ring. Back to "her" room last night. She was pretty on edge, but she didn't get much sleep (getting back on schedule for the schoolyear.)
There's a little less anger in the air though.
I'm taking it slow. Not pursuing. I think this is significant progress, but I'm not going to smother her.
Me: 35 W: 31 S:9 M: 10 years Together 13 MySitch - Ups & Downs She moved out the day before Thanksgiving 2009, over 13 months post-bomb.
