You may want to try "olive of cloves" for your gum pain. It was recommended by my dentist many years ago and it works. You do not need a prescription for it.
As for your h missing for several nights....they sometimes do this. When he returns, do not ask him where he's been....you will be tempted to do this, but let it go. In time, when he feels like "mom" isn't going to jump all over him, he will tell you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
