IF your Husband is indeed having a MLC then you will have to allow him the space to get through it.
And unfortunately this could take years.
If your Husband is just testing the waters of his new found freedom and is a WAS, then it may only be a few months until he gets his head screwed on straight.
Either way, you have to get yourself together.
Work on your own issues, make some changes.
There is alot of forgiveness to take place in the Marriage, from both of you.
There isn't a single person on these boards who can honestly say they did nothing to contribute to the demise of their marriage.
The old marriage is now dead.
The goal is to have a new and better relationship, whether this means as friends, and getting to know one another again and rebuilding trust, or piecing and actually working on reconcilling the marriage.
There is never a need to be nasty, or to make ultimatums or set conditions. He is an adult, and although as his wife, you may feel you have a right to tell him what to do, you no longer are in the postion of having a say in his life.
You may of course set your own boundaries, things you do for yourself that protect you.
You know what you can handle.
For example, if he decides he wants to be intimate with you, while still involved with the OW, you can tell him that it makes you feel too uncomfortable, rather then telling him to end it with her first.
Your words and your own body language are what he will be watching. He will be watching your every move to see if in fact you have changed.
This is a long process GG, and each day you will feel a little stronger and more sure of yourself.
((((hugs)))
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
