Thanks guys, I had a pretty rough night. For some reason my brain decided to replay all the lies and not telling me stuff that have happened over the past two years at 5am this morning. I feel like I have gone 10 rounds. Not fun. Although my little cat was just a darling watching over me and actually cuddling me a bit - or at least lying near me we don't want to go too far
I know what you mean GAG, for some reason this pop song was going round in my head too all night it wasn't good. I think it was because I took a day to relax and stop and I guess it sunk in about him being on holiday. I get so angry and frustrated with myself if I let it get to me as I feel I am letting myself down. I am way too stubborn. That bike ride sounds amazing!
Thanks Cas. I know that i have to let myself grieve sometimes. I hate feeling this way after so long though. I just shouldn't be.
I love that quote Nell, thank you! I think visiting my brother should help. He lived in Singapore for a year Cas last year before my niece was born. Sigh, I shall make my way down to the south coast and hopefully that should help.
I think being a little hormonal doesn't help either!
we don't want to go too far 
