My Intro: Thanks for Reading!

[RedSoxFan]

I think you didn't really validate and ask her where she specifically felt misunderstood because you want to improve the communication (she is telling you that is a huge issue for her)...
[snip]
You get my drift? Best to keep the issues separate and clear and exhibit that you can focus on the specific issue she brought up, which was that regardless of what you think, she feels misunderstood.

I followed up with an email to dig deeper into that. I sensed that I was overlooking something. I guess it was quite obvious.

And, it would behoove you, for your own sake to get really clear on what the agreement is, cuz as I read it, it is not clear. It sounds like she intends to use her discretion regarding what kind of contact the kids will have with OM and she doesn't want to have to run it by you anymore.

Well, we don't have an agreement on exposure of kids to OM. I asked her to not expose them and she said she would minimize because she didn't feel anything else was possible or practical. But we didn't shake on it. I don't agree but I do see her predicament. Some folks on the forum suggested that it's her problem to figure out. I don't really want to be mean or make life hard for her. But I do care about our kids and I do want her back.