(((GAG))) Yes he does value affluence. I thought he didn't as I don't particularly. We struggled for money for a long time in the beginning and it was only when we both finally got reasonably paid jobs that he left. He didn't even wait for my first pay cheque! He likes to flash the cash but so far it hasn't been on me. Perhaps that is something I can work on. I've been offering to pay in the past. Perhaps with my new turn-around I won't, and let him pay his way and perhaps more... something to think about, thank you.
(((Nell)) Well, deep down it does of course bother me. But, I came to DBing late in the game 6 months after he dropped the first bomb. I spent those six months pursuing. I think when the bomb first hits you have a lot more leverage with your h. After spending 6 months being completely desperate I had a lot of work to undo. Also, by the time I found out about ow he was moving in with her and moving on with his life. I don't really have a lot of choice in my actions if I want to reconcile, which I do. I spent a long time building up positive interactions and being consistent with him again as he was too scared of my reactions to speak to me and too guilty and now I am sitting back and enjoying life and seeing if he is willing to make any sort of effort. So far, I’m not unimpressed with his efforts. And it is also semi-gratifying to know that whilst he is with ow he is communicating and thinking about me.
Let the man pursue you and don't shut down his attempts at communication - especially because you are hurt. It just makes him shut down. Accept the gesture with grace not because you need him to make these gestures but just because he is.
I'm rubbish too, at knitting that is, but it was something to do whilst watching TV when I gave up smoking. Aren't the iknit guys amazing, though one of them is sooo grumpy.
Looks like we're all going dark together, yahoo, this has to be done.
Yeah, he really is isn't he. I tried to ask him something once and he was so moody over it and basically told me it was obvious - nice! But no, they are great aren't they.
I booked my flights!!!! Woop, woop! I'm going on holiday!!!!!
Flying to Singapore, then doing some travelling round SE Asia and flying out of Bangkok to Sydney. Then to Auckland and travelling down to Christchurch then to LA and back home. 5 weeks in total - 24th December to the 30th January.
You are going to be one tired lady! So glad you are doing something just for you. I forgot that you are quite a bit younger than me...it won't be so bad. LOL
You are going to make some really special memories for yourself.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I too wish that I had found DB'ing earlier ... I feel like I have wasted a lot of time and opportunity - especially at the beginning of July when, if I had acted a lot differently, I could have still had H at home and not for him to have left.
We live and learn.
I am trying now to make a DB Salad and use everything together but in complimentary style ... semi-dark, words of affirmation, quality time (when we get any) and evidence of my GAL'ing. Securing a job would be the Dream Topping 180!
Probably got it all wrong, again!
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
