update- verrrrrrry long story short- he confessed to earlier affair- one time thing. Very sorry for it. No longer in contact with her. Said nothing is happening now but he can't trust himself in LDR. Said he was prepared for whatever I decided. Proceeded to call me all afternoon and push me into making immediate decision. I asked him some questions. He says he loves me, but is not in love. I said if I were to consider taking him back (which I was really leaning toward), he would need to agree to some things, starting with him going to therapy. I told him I would make the appointment for him. I said "can you do that?" he said "I don't know" HE CAN'T COMMIT TO ONE GODDARN THERAPY SESSION? He proceeded to ask me about all the things I was going to do to make the R work! "When will you come to visit?" "What if I want kids right now?" "What if I want to move to Mexico"? ME ME ME. He dug his own grave. It was clear- he isn't going to change. I can take the affair, I can take him treating me like crap most of the time, but I can't take both! And he's not even willing to lift a finger to make this marriage work! Within another hour he had my decision. IT'S OVER. He has proceeded to call me over and over again crying, apologizing for the hurt he caused. I took his first call, told him all the things in my heart about how he has hurt me, and also that he no longer has any power over me. I was VERY compassionate, but told him he now has to let me heal! He keeps calling me. I'm not answering. He's now realizing what he has lost, but it's too late! If only he had been willing to lift a finger. Cry me a river, baby! Cry me a river! Because I've cried rivers and lakes over you. I am emailing him now to ask him to stop calling, and give me a little peace after I have been completely devastated. I told him to call his parents. They need to comfort him- it's not my job anymore. Even now, he is so selfish. I don't owe him anything! He already took everything! I am empty! He robbed me of my dreams, a marriage I believed in and worked my ass off for. What more does he want?
