I think counseling will do you a world of wonders. The sitch your H has created has turned your life upside-down and you need help to get thru it.
Physically, are you going to be okay? Do you have a friend with you in case something happens?
I think you mentioned your aren't particularly religious but do pray. My spirituality has taken a turn since my sitch began and I am so grateful for that. I am here today, still strong, because of my faith in God. He has helped me carry my burdens.
Me: 39 H: 39 S: 15 M: 18 years Bomb: 6/3/09 H moved out: 10/15/09 H moved back:5/30/10