Well Jimbo, I did want to say it looks like the R discussion from the other night did come back to haunt me. As you know today is our anniversary. In the heat of our discussion the other night, I said well I guess our anniversay day doesn't mean anything to me anymore. I also said that I wasn't going to go tonight to the fundraiser. This morning I said I am going. She sent me a note a short time ago saying too late to get a baby sitter and I said today didn't mean anything anyway. I responded we are both saying things we don't mean to hide the hurt. Anyway, I guess that is why you don't have the R discussion. The things she says to me are so hurtful. I know I should respond, but sometimes it just comes out. I am just trying to protect myself from the pain and trying to give her some of her own pain back. I obviously have a long way to go on the DB front....
I do have a choice, show up anyway. But probably would appear desperate or trying to check up on her. I guess I would rather be somewhere where I am wanted rather than not. I would imagine I also gave her an easy out for tonight. Or I can just go do something with my sons.
She just makes it so hard sometimes to be compassionate.
Remarried 6 mo S 12 S 13 S 16 SD 12 SD 16 SD 17 SS 19
