Hey all. I was an active member back in May-Dec '08. Was going through my second D at the time. First M ended due to her cheating, and second M due to a lot of doubt, saying I don't love you anymore etc on her part.
Anyway, my D is over as of Feb, and I haven't talked to her since April. She had expressed the want to be friends, but I quickly realized her version of friends was much different than mine when she just had to tell me about her new partner and how the first time they had sex it was all night, etc. I couldn't take it anymore after that, and to this day, part of me still thinks that was her getting revenge (for what, I don't know)
I have effectively moved on with my life and have been dating quite a bit for a while now. Here is the thing....I've grown to figure out that being alone, or being single is OK, but I still think about her all the time. I have not gone to therapy for quite a while, but the reason I stopped in the first place was because I felt it wasn't getting anwywhere. So....how do you deal with recurring thoughts of your ex? I have "gotten over" her, but still think about her constantly.
Just take it one day at a time. Find other things to fill your time. Go out and meet new people who share the same interests as you. Start a new hobby. Do something you have always wanted to do but never had the time.
Not sure if there's a part of you thinking this or not - but her suicide is not your fault in any way, shape or form. Ok? Might even be a good time to invest in a few individual counseling sessions.
Last edited by Dia; 08/27/0912:39 AM.
The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.
My sitch - Divorce Busted! http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
I can't imagine what you're feeling now. You have done so well in your life to be able to move on after adverse situations. I am so sorry that this has happened, that she wasn't able to heal her heart.
Do you have people around you now to comfort and care for you?
Wishing and praying for peace in your heart and comfort knowing the love you once shared together is still there.
sg
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
I believe that when we die, our love doesn't die with us; rather it is made eternal, and made perfect. I hope this thought brings you some comfort. My prayers are with you.
M60 H52 D20 M14 yrs OW-old gf from 1986 bomb-5/18/08 H filed for D-9/10/08 D final 4/24/09 xH remarried (not OW) 2012
