As always, I support you w/whatever you choose and I too am a believer in "never say never" but it would take an awful lot for me to be able to forgive and go back and honestly, I just don't see that happening in my sitch. So, I've chosen to move forward.
I can't really see your stbx doing the right things needed either b/c he's so screwed up inside his own skin.
Thus, you do deserve better and you will find the one you are destined to be with. This situation, regardless of how painful and difficult, has been placed in your lap to help you become better not only for your family, but for your own happiness in the future.
To that end, I'd have to concur that you do "need to be done" as stbx is clearly "not good for you."
Your analysis seems to be correct and as your astrologer said, "go w/your gut right now as you are very intuitive."
