WAW - Very confused and devastated - pt 11

[confusedinpa]

Thanks for all the support everyone.

I had been really run down since I've started this new job, with the commuting back and forth each week, as well as dealing with the emotions of being so far away from my boys and finding out about the BS that my wife has been pulling.

Guess it really caught up with me over the last 36 hours of letting all hit me.

I know it may sound horrible but I have stopped not just praying for wife to return home as well as stopped praying for my wife period. Perhaps I've slipped into a darker part of me than I should and really need to think about that.

She hasn't contacted me at all today. Not sure what she is doing nor do I care.

I know I need to move full steam ahead with my life for me and my boys. If she is not part of it, that is her loss. I do not need people in my life who do not respect and care for me. I talked to one of my close friends just before lunch and he reminded me that as long as I live my life with honor, there is no such thing as failure.

It is dissapointing what has transpired over the last 12-18 months, but I can not focus on the mistakes and the loss. I still have plenty to be proud of that I can hold my head up high.

So I'm slowly digging myself out of this funk. I've done it before and will do it again.