Thanks for the ideas Ash. S is 6, so I can take something to sleep and it's a good idea. I was doing much better not thinking about OW. Not sure why it is coming up again. I think it's just because I am realizing all my effort is waisted if she doesn't GO AWAY. I know my H has to decide that is the right choice or she will just keep coming back in. They use the "just friends" excuse even though there is tons of evidence to the contrary. I guess that is why I get so obsessed, that someone would have the gal to behave that way and then not even apologize or see their error after having it pointed out. My H has seen it, admitted it is not a healthy relationship, and then I think he slides back into it and I think a big reason is because she convinces him I am just crazy/insecure whatever.
Anyway, does me no good to obsess over it. So, my S and I love to go to the beach and park. I am trying to connect with other mom's and kids because I really enjoy that social piece and it keeps him busy too.
H and I do a lot with him also as a family, which I think is good for S, but I wonder if it isn't making it too easy on H. Basically he get's to see S often and can go home to his apartment and drink and do whatever he does. He says he is lonely and miserable and want's to come home, but seems he has it made. We'll see. I have set up clear boundaries and have my own time frame set in my mind. Hard to know how much of this is OW, how much is addiction, how much is lack of committment to M. I can't believe over a year later I am still trying to figure this out. Remind me again why it wouldn't just be easier to start over with someone else.
